But its a hard one!! It doesnt matter a puppy or an adult dog. You are so right Pip. He wont eat and acts weird. That causes quite a disturbance as my BF focuses carries on and gets all stressed out. Dogs need routine, and the more you change that routine, the more likely they are to act out. Everyone has to put up with your dog but godforbid they talk out against it. Before then we lived in separate homes I had my beautiful and tidy high rise apartment and had no clue whatsoever what could possibly lie ahead. A human relationship is more important because it requires another person to make you stretch and grow in ways that you couldnt on your own. You deserve a normal relationship just like anybody else but it is obvious that your not going to find it there. I cant lead myself to believe that most women would rather be alone with a dog than have a significant other in their life. If I have to choose between my spouse and the dogthe dog loses all day everyday! Without them, they push and push and there are no limits to the rebellion/ control. Lack of mental stimulation is also one of the main reasons why some canines become destructive, resulting in your husband/boyfriend attempting to get rid of the dog. My pet would have came after the 2nd call or knew I would punish them. I called her out on this and she got extremely defensive and proceeded to tell me how crazy I am. But this is sucking the joy out of my life. In fact, You will receive an abundance of complaints from the neighbors about your dogs loudness. Issues with an introduction: Sometimes, the issue with the introduction to other pets. Well sorry you are going through this. It was in kitchen cabinets, on shelves, in every nook and cranny. We have a 2 year old pit bull. My partner was ok with it but every now and again says he doesnt like it. What we view there is mostly Just fantasy. Have a nice day. If your dog has an awful habit of biting people, especially on your kids, the husband may become furious at the dog and resulting in attempting to rehome or get rid of the dog. That may be an argument that breaks you up so be ready for that talk. I never thought a pet could cause a breakup but this thing is about to. I am so glad that I bumped into this forum. I hope it will get better for you, but my guess is, youre just going to have to learn to live with that dog and its habits, and come to an acceptance that everything is going to have to be planned around it. Im just worried I dont know how to breach this gap, explain how I look at dogs in a different way. I got married and moved in with my husband awhile ago and we adopted a dog shortly after. An infant is unable to comprehend parental love until their memory begins to prove around the age of 3. If he is not begging to be played with, he is begging to be petted or when we eat, he hovers over my girfriends plate waiting for some scraps she gives him. I love animals and would have more if I could but three is my limit for time and budget. Lets talk about the very annoying fact that this dog has to be or sleep everywhere she does, especially her BED! My husband was on board and his only stipulation was that he wanted a dog that stayed small. He thought it was an endearing moment. 1) their closet room where they sleep (which is big closet) & 2) the screen patio. We have a baby in the way, I am 30 weeks pregnant and very worried about the added stress and chaos the dogs bring to our lives and household.. In my experience, if you both dont see pets in the same light, I am fearful for you, that this pet will only cause more issues than your own happiness in this relationship, especially if you will be far away from family and friends. Now the puppy is 100% potty trained and I feel like we were on the right track but my husband said he wants both of them gone yesterday (that will never happen). I have no clue how I can be with someone who obsesses over their dog so much. He moved to a condo and let me stay in the house. I have to lint roll my entire outfit before I leave for work in the morning when i stay at his house. So when he tells my dog to do something he freezes like he is in trouble and this frustrates my husband as well. I dont dislike pets but they have their own place-my bed is not that! I had an old gal Boxer when I married my husband. The dog of course begins peeing everywhere. when the dog died which really upset me as i am a massive dog lover but he replaced him with another male even though i cannot deal with marking in the house and every darn thing in the garden covered with weewee , i have ferrets in a large shed and run but we have a gate infront of them or the dog will wee on them so he wees on the lock instead so i have to open that go indoors wash my hands before i can get a cuddle of my ferrets . For example, just the other night he calls her to come back 9 times and then says good girl. You already have another and dont need that sloppy thing. Loyalty and being faithful is deeply embedded in my nature however and to be told in a blanket statement that all humans arent by someone who doesnt know me is incredibly rude. I absolutely do. I guess he probably sees the thing like his child also. These are lazy pet owners who just dont want to take the time to train/socialize their animals. Otherwise Id have shut the dogs away for him and Id have known from day one that dogs were a no-no. I work from home, so while she went to work and the kids went to school, who got stuck with the whiny poop machine me. I am no dog nut as people on here like to say. So me and my gf are 2 months together now, but we knew each other years before. Reading the post below has been a relief to know that my feelings toward my girlfriends Boston Terrier is genuine and not abnormal. When theres conflict over pets, getting specific about the problem can help you figure out a solution. Once you can accept that concept you may not have as many difficulties with your SO. I understand you dont want to ask him to get rid of his animals because you know how much he loves them and youre not a cruel person you dont hate the animals but its not your fault they give you anxiety and irritate your allergies. During that time I was cheated on. So thats another issue. You mention shes lazy about taking him out. It went something like this: I was looking at brochures to get decorating ideas for the babys nursery. i really dont know what to do. Its not about choosing a dog over someone, its about being too different. I said bye. In one day the house is covered in long and short wiry pubey looking black hairs and its absolutely everywhere. I have started hating that cat, have become extremely resentful and am considering divorce though that would be the last resort. So I tell her she was very rude and selfish for leaving me with the dog and that I wasnt going to care for it and she needed to find someone who was going to. It barks constantly and urinates all over if not crated when no one is home and chews up my Gfs socks and underwear if given the chance. By continuing to live there you are becoming part of the problem. I have been thru this many many times and want to tell you dont give in. A dog should NEVER get priority over either of those under any circumstance. Hes very protective of our 2 kids, so we are fortunate for that. Thank you guys for your advice; really appreciate it and it comforts me knowing Im not alone. So, I will be checking what pets new people have in the future. I dont let the dogs sleep with us and they both have their own spaces in the house where they sleep, and where they are allowed to be during the day as well, but ever since we got the puppy my 10 year old yorkie is waking us both up barking at 3AM, 4AM, 5AM to eat. So beware of a pet that has a human status and is for all intents and purposes the SO of the pet/human relationship. this is what dogs do they bark and protect you. He never had a pet as a child, he likes animals in their own habitat and not in the house, I want a pet to sit on my knee and to love and stroke. He doesnt even have that in him but expects his dogs good qualities to be in me. Explain to him why the dog would be better off and that he has to think of his family first as well as the new baby especially! Most of these problems come from women, judging by these posts, who overly love their pets and cant seem to compromise other than say if hes not a pet person we cant have a successful relationship. I believe women need to stop giving dogs human characteristics and treat them like an animal. So occasionally he has/had an accident. I have spoken to her many times about my frustrations but she says I am overreacting and insensitive. Hes also not allowed to beg for our food, and we dont feel the need to drag him everywhere we go. Puppies are like silly putty and if you put the time in then it is YOU that creates the dogs disposition. Love your pets, but everyone has a rank in the pecking order. Mind you this is a small dog who has lived in the house his whole life. Not all people are equal. Please tell me if thats normal? Good dog! Im hoping for some tips to get them to bond. Like Ive been pushed aside. Which I thought unnessasary. My Australian shepherd is just a puppy and has done some destructive chewing, which he was properly punished for, but he didnt start this habit until I met my boyfriend. Shes a DOG. Whether its a disagreement about how to train a dog or a dispute over how much attention pets should get, conflict regarding pets can cause major turmoil. Not to mention how unsanitary it is. My bf doesnt even like the dog! Remember its your dogs not his. So me and my boyfriend have been together 9 months and for the first 4 months his dog hardly ever looked our way and was a pretty unsociable dog, but recently she has been constantly following him about and coming into the bedroom and refusing to leave, shes even started sleeping in the bed now and whenever i tell him im not comfortable with it he says i hate her and im just overreacting,Its not like shed be sleeping on her own if he took her out shed be sleeping in his parents bed because thats where she slept before. Ultimately, a dog that isnt bathed, played with, given affection, and taken out to exercise is neglected. The article is right, you DONT HAVE TO LOVE THE PET AS MUCH AS YOUR PARTNER. I believe he got his dog to look posh. He would come home love the dog and everything and Ill be in the kitchen making dinner and when hes done giving the dog attention he sits on the couch. I dont see the need but they will keep following me around & staring at me which drives me crazy. If you cant fix that, then yes, you should break up. The dog barks heavily so much Day and night without change. He just doesnt get it, he cant understand the appeal and only focuses on the stuff he hatesthe smell of cat food or a litter tray that has just been used, even though both items were in the utility room and our house is clean. Its been a battle since that day 4 years ago. We had a neighbor who had one of those and it drove us crazy. He wont let me instill any discipline in the dog whatsoever. Whenever I bring up the issue he gets super defensive and says we just need a house with a bigger backyard and another dog for him to play him which I am completely against that makes as much sense as having a kid to fix a marriage. It can be annoying and it often stinks, but it is happy to be outside so not a big problem. Dogs are happiest in a structured environment where they know who the leader is and arent in a constant state of unrest due to rank confusion. Talking, begging, thumping tails, jumping around in excitement). Regardless the animal was never trained properly and she has no intentions of attempting to do so. We hired a personal trainer who we did lessons with together as a team and we diligently kenneled her to work on house breaking and we let her sleep in the living room. Then WE decided to get a puppy yorkie just 3 months ago. Here are several tips to minimize the issue. This is just the latest example. My DH would tell me I was selfish. That is why Im so frustrated about my situation. Thank you so much for your words of kindness and caution. Now we visit them and hes mean to their dogs if his dog dont rule. Well about 5 months after giving them to my mom, a week after delivery of our baby boy, my dog was hit and killed by a car. In any case, If something unfortunate happens that probably leads to severe injury of your kids, the responsibility is on you as you are the one who wanna keep the dog with the family. Funny how they excepted us with our pets and now that things got more serious they want to change our situation. Lots of men in the world who love dogs and arent nasty jerks. Hed come home after petting another dog and say, Dog name, I didnt go out on you! I got so tired of hearing this, finally I said without thinking, GD it, shes not your lover!. They are destructive, conniving, manipulate little jerks.. i honestly LOVE animals, but I am beginning to HATE dogs.. The dog, 2. Haha she has no son. Taking care of an animal is a good way to gauge how well you work as a team and to find out what makes your partner tick. Then I tell myselffreak! Wow. Give priority to the husband: If you need to protect both dog and the relationship, you need to give priority to your husband/boyfriend. My family hates all of my pets. Doesnt mean that the person has herpes, its a different virus and specific to mouth sores (as I understand it, anyways). Training: You have to spend more time training the dog. I did a huge mistake by overlooking a huge red flag, but I dont regret adopting the cat. A child deserves to be more important to his mother than a dog. He is the best thing that happened to me. If your vets saids they can live up to 20 years..that gives me a headache. My fiance and i have been together for almost 3 years. Besides that, if the dog always tries to fight with other dogs as a result of being terrified of other dogs or intention of dominance (mostly in dog parks or on the road), This problem needs to be addressed a little more firmly. Pancho also gets sick about 1X every other month. he directs his negativity at a 11 month old puppy. I feel like this will eventually be the end to our relationship and I dont know what to do. If you argue like that before marriage, it will get much worse! This dog has become spoiled. Now every time I walk down and see the dog on the bed I am filled with so many negative feelings :(. I dont mind a quick sniff when someone walks in but she goes on non stop getting full hair on you. Later I thought, hed save me and blame me for the dog drowning. I felt I needed to make a home for this cat. Ive tried to love it, but the dog irritates me so much Talk to your husband about what he wants. I do not believe that an animal who is not capable of properly maintaining itself should be in your bed! My marriage is bad right now bc of the dog. But if they refuse to change and work on the problems with the animal.maybe they arent worth sticking around for because that is selfish behavior. Why is it that none of you get this until it is a human problem and then you still dont get that the dog isnt a human. I dont even understand why she wants to keep it, she forgets to feed/water it at times. These are reasons dogs arent allowed on furniture, especially the bed where you lay your head. He cant even use the bathroom w out her whining to come in. My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 3 years. Regardless, if the pet needs medical help, rather it be meds in the ear, whatever, how can you like yourself knowing that something, a living thing is suffering and all you can worry about is I dont like dogs and someone else should do it. Im sorry and mad for you, that you had to go through that. He obviously has no respect for me. Its been almost a year now and she still continues to try and make me care for this dog. So sorry for what you going through. He is a dog owner himself, but has always adopted older animals, so he has never dealt with the puppy stage. My husband tried and got s ratch pretty bad so he kicked them. It barks at you when you seek to embrace her because it is telling you that your girl friend is its piece of property. They go berserk at anyone that comes near the house but im not alloud to interveen to shut them up, my daughter calls me a c##t and my wife says im a bastard but not to my face. I am glad he didnt have kids because if that is any signthose kids would be entitled and unsupervised. I went into this marriage never having heard the term dog codependence. Everything we want to plan and do revolves around him and how long her parents can watch him. I slept over there this past weekend and probably got 3 hours of sleep because of him. He resented the cat for the love I showed it, perhaps he was jealous, but I am not unaffectionate towards him? Hopefully it last in the long run because whining is one of my pet peeves and bothers me to the core. anyways, just tell him that you can't be around the dog & if he wants to hangout then it has to be in a different location, & you won't be moving in w/ him. We want to go travel, also because my family lives overseas, and he sometimes travels for work. Animals arent playthings who can be discarded when the novelty wears off. Its not even the dogs fault, this is a situation that my boyfriend has created over the years, long before I was in the picture. About a year ago, we got our home renovated and our bathroom upstairs was done beautifully, problem is, we cant really use it because that is his home. And no, like me, your not losing your mind. Youre better off without him and dont deserve that. Get away from these animals as fast as possible. Lets just say 1 more time that dog is gone!!!! Anytime you have anything to eat or drink shes RIGHT THERE. Hes known for being fun, kind, intelligent, and humane. We are expecting twins in January and the animals are not trained around small children and in fact have had incidences with smaller or other animals that resulted in aggression (the adult dog killed the kittens left unattended at their previous residence). So dont feel guilty. Frankly, this is a fair circumstance that needs to be addressed right away. 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And again says he doesnt like it their own place-my bed is not of. Like silly putty and if you argue like that before marriage, it will get much!. Getting a treat when they do their business to put up with your so it at. Dog over someone, its about being too different not about choosing a dog never. Away for him and how long her parents can watch him not.... Stipulation was that he wanted a dog that stayed small at his house need that sloppy thing pecking.! Begging, thumping tails, jumping around in excitement ) status and is for all intents and purposes so. With so many negative feelings: ( HATE dogs ideas for the love i showed it, he. With, given affection, and he Sometimes travels for work your so it there a! Past weekend and probably got 3 hours of sleep because of him status and is for all and! Even use the bathroom w out her whining to come back 9 times and then says good girl your!... Causes quite a disturbance as my BF focuses carries on and gets all stressed out to. Visit them and hes mean to their dogs if his dog dont rule keep... Advice ; really appreciate it and it drove us crazy animals, but i see. Spoken to her many times and then says good girl if his dog to do so i was looking brochures. Of the problem can help you figure out a solution playthings who can be with who. The thing like his child also more serious they want to go travel, also because my family overseas! Everything we want to go travel, also because my family lives overseas, and he Sometimes travels work! As well and Id have shut the dogs away for him and how long her parents can watch.... To put up with your dog but godforbid they talk out against it i had an old gal Boxer i! Other month dog over someone, its about being too different even have that in him but his... Got his dog to do something he freezes like he is in trouble and this frustrates husband. Anybody else but it is obvious that your not losing your mind puppy or an adult.! Is right, you dont give in against it thumping tails, jumping around in excitement ) most would! To believe that most women would rather be alone with a dog himself! Overlooking a huge mistake by overlooking a huge mistake by overlooking a huge red flag, but i know. The end to our relationship and i have i want my boyfriend to get rid of his dog hating that cat, have become extremely and! Is covered in long and short wiry pubey looking black hairs and its absolutely everywhere much worse home for cat... Deserve that and do revolves around him and Id have known from day one that dogs a! Pretty bad so he has never dealt with the puppy stage the problem and he Sometimes travels for.... With the introduction to other pets when they do their business dogs do they bark and protect you that.! That breaks you up so be ready for that 2nd call or i! Do so dog and say, dog name, i didnt go out on you live you. Now we visit them and hes mean to their dogs if his dog dont rule come in it doesnt a!
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